Giddy Tim Kaine Presses Face Against Campaign Bus Window As Horse Trailer Drives By

LIMA, OH—Pointing at the vehicle and shrieking with delight, giddy Democratic vice presidential nominee Tim Kaine reportedly pressed his face against the window of his campaign bus Wednesday to gawk at a passing horse trailer. “Look, look, there’s two horseys!” said Kaine, his eyes widening with excitement and his mouth, nose, and palms leaving large smudges on the glass as he gazed at the pair of thoroughbreds being transported. “Hillary, look! One’s brown and the other’s got spots! Do you think they’re going to a big farm?” At press time, sources confirmed the riled-up Virginia senator was galloping down the center aisle of the bus repeatedly shouting “Neigh!”

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